Lost Light

A shiver racked her body as she woke. It was still so cold. So damp. The rain still hadn’t let up. It fell from the sky like a bucket being poured over the grass. Each rain drop splashing off of every leaf, twig and rock before settling into the dirt. She sat up and pulled her knees to her chest and rested her chin. How long had she been asleep? Was she ever going to make it home? Was she ever going to see that light again? How could it just disappear like that? More importantly how could it just leave her here? Anger bubbled in her chest before she picked her head up and glared into the woods. Bitter. Frustrated.

How could it do that to her? Then…the anger started to cease. She couldn’t be angry at it. The light didn’t make her follow. She chose to follow it. It was her decision to come here. With a sigh she rested her head once more. It wasn’t worth getting upset over. She was here. Now it was up to her to find the light again. As if someone turned the volume on the stereo down the rain quieted. Rain drops continued to work their way down the leaves and branches but no additional drops were falling from the sky. This was her chance. With a groan she climbed out from the tree trunk, shielding her eyes from the cloudy sky. No sun, but at least the rain had given up for now. She winced as she put some weight onto her ankle. She was still hurt. She looked around the forest, turning in every direction. Was it still waiting for her?

She took a step forward and immediately regretted it, leaning against a tree for support. Then she saw it. The small orb of light peeking out from behind a tree in the distance. It waited? All this time it waited for her? Then it raced off down a path, disappearing again.

“No! Wait!” She called out after it. With a new found strength she hurried after it, limping after it as best as she could. Her breaths were heavy as she forced herself to continue after it. She was determined to follow it this time. Ankle hurt or not, this light was the most important thing to her right now. The small orb raced along the forest floor and up a hill where it hovered, waiting for her. It seemed to look back at her and say, “Are you coming?” She huffed a breath and started to carefully make her way up the slight slope. When she made it to the top the light hovered next to her, not racing away this time. She tried to catch her breath, looking at the light.

“Why did you run from me…? What are you..?” The light flew around her, swirling through her legs until it settled next to her again. It seemed to gesture to what waited in the distance. A sight more beautiful than anything she’d ever seen in her entire life. A crystal lake. Something she had no idea was here. The trees surrounding the lake were reflecting like a mirror in the water. Tears slid down her cheeks and she wiped at them, trying to take everything in. Beauty was overwhelming. When she looked back to the light…it was gone. Her chest rose and fell, worrying again that she’d lost it. She tried to catch her breath when she looked into the distance and saw the small orb floating a ways out. More tears filled her eyes. She reached out to it but it was out of her grasp now. “Wait, please…I need you. Please don’t leave me.”

The light seemed to smile. It didn’t have a face but somehow she could feel it. It hovered towards her and disappeared into her chest. She let out a gasp of air and her hand flew to her chest. She could feel the light inside her and it seemed to say, “I’m right here. Always.”

All of her pain seemed to dissipate. All of her exhaustion from this journey lifted. She smiled. She never needed to chase the light. She never needed to find this lake. It was with her always. It inspired her always. It kept her safe always. It was never lost and it never would be again.

 

I’m a Wanderer

With a tug of her shoe laces she was ready to go. Today was a day for an adventure. She glanced over at her window, one or two rain drops sliding down the cold glass. The rain had finally let up. A soft fog traveled past her window, lingering in the air like the scent of flowers in Spring. What could possibly await her?

The small orange cat looked up at her disapprovingly. It’s still cold. It’s still rainy. How dare you leave me? He seemed to say. She smiled and reached a hand out, petting his head softly and putting both hands on her knees.

“Aw, buddy. I’ll be back.” She stood to her full height and picked a worn backpack up from the floor. It was filled with little things. A granola bar, some rope, a pocket knife, a few bottles of water, and a blanket. She had to be prepared. She grabbed a large scarf and wrapped it around her neck a few times, making sure she was bundled. She turned the door handle and immediately braced as the cool air swept in. She stepped onto the damp wood of her porch and closed the door behind her. The sounds around her were refreshing. The sound of a small brook bubbling in the distance and the quiet pitter and patter of rain drops onto the fallen leaves. She took a breath and clutched the straps of her backpack, taking the first few steps onto the damp ground. Some of the freshly fallen leaves crunched under her brown leather boots. Where would these boots take her today?

She turned to look back at the small cabin. Home. A smile worked it’s way onto her lips and she turned back to the woods. There would be another day to stay at home. The sound of leaves and branches crunching under her boots filled her ears. It was just her and the woods. Then something caught her eye. A sparkle. Something like a flash of light. She looked and saw an orb of light hanging in the air, floating up and down gently. Her mouth dropped and almost as soon as she saw it…it was gone. It sped off down a trail, ducking behind some trees. What on earth was that? She was intrigued. She turned off her normal path and ducked under some branches. The small light peeked out from behind a tree and saw she was following, continuing down the path. She swallowed hard, unsure of what she was following. She had to know. The light bounced and raced through the trees until it disappeared down a slope in the forest floor. She quickly picked up the pace, huffing a breath as she reached the top and looked down. Where had it gone?

At the bottom of the slope was a narrow river. It was flowing strong after the fresh rain. The sound was relaxing. She sighed and carefully trotted down, nearly slipping on the wet leaves and grass. She stopped at the small river, sitting on a large rock and trying to catch her breath. Where had that light gone? Could it really be so fleeting and fast and then…gone? She looked around, hearing nothing but the sound of the water and the light chirp of birds in the distance. She glanced up through the trees, seeing a cloudy sky looking down at her. Still not much sign of the sun but at least it was trying. She took her backpack off of her shoulders and pulled out a water bottle, twisting the top off and taking a long sip. She lowered it from her lips with a gasp and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. She had to find it. She twisted the cap back on with a nod and shut her backpack.

Just then, and just for a moment, she saw it again. That little ball of light flash behind a tree. Was it hiding this whole time? She stood and ran towards the river, scanning the rock pattern to try and get across. She jumped onto a rock and it wobbled beneath her weight. She gasped and caught herself, jumping to the next rock swiftly until she was across. She huffed a breath and looked over her shoulder, thankful she hadn’t fallen in. She would’ve froze. She turned back to the woods, determined to follow the light. She hurried after it, racing and twisting and turning as it flew. A downed branch caught her foot and she fell. She braced as her body slammed into the cold and wet ground. Pain surged through her legs and arms. A shiver racked her spine as the wet grass and leaves soaked her leggings and sweater. She lifted herself up, seeing the small light hovering up and down a ways ahead of her. It looked as if it were waiting for her to get up and then it was gone again, continuing on it’s path. With a groan she picked herself up and called out after it.

“Wait!” But it was too late. It was gone. She picked herself up and limped slightly as pain stabbed her right ankle. Had she sprained it? How far was she from home? She looked over her shoulder instinctively, not even recognizing where she was anymore. Then she heard it. The slow and gradual grow of heavy rain. Oh no. Then she was soaked. Her brown locks falling flat against her head. Goosebumps covered her skin and she immediately sought cover. She limped her way over to a tree that looked like the biggest tree she’d ever seen. A large hole was in the bottom, practically inviting her in for shelter from the rain. She pulled herself under and dropped to sitting, immediately relieved of the pressure from standing on her ankle. She winced and rubbed at it, trying to work out any pain. With a sigh she unwrapped the scarf from around her neck and used it as a towel, drying off her hair and watching the now rain turned to downpour. She opened her backpack and pulled out the blanket she had packed, wrapping it around her shoulders and shivering.

Where was the light? Where had it gone? She had so many questions. What was it? Why was it asking her to follow it? Part of her wondered if she’d ever see it again.

 

Cold Sunday Morning

She woke up slow. There was the sound of rain softly pattering against the roof. She yawned and rolled over, pulling the covers further over herself. On a Sunday morning like this, why shouldn’t she sleep more? Still…she found herself not able to drift back into her quiet dreams. She looked at the soft white painted wall next to the bed and blinked a few times. Maybe it was time to get up after all.

She swung her legs over the bed and hunched over, letting out another yawn and rubbing at her eyes. Another glance over her shoulder at the window in her room. The curtains were drawn but she could tell it was still raining. It was dark, cloudy…the perfect Sunday morning. Her bare feet touched the cool hardwood floor and she hissed slightly. Maybe it was time to turn on the heat. Her bed let out a creak as she stood and shuffled her way into the living room. A small orange cat stirred on the couch and looked up at her sleepily. He didn’t seem to want to be awake either. She smiled and made her way over to a small fireplace. Her limbs felt like they were still sleeping as she knelt down and pulled open the heavy cast iron door. She grabbed some twigs and branches and delicately placed them into the small fireplace. With another yawn she reached out and felt around the top of the fireplace for a box of matches. The box was old and worn out from years of use. One match left. She’d actually have to buy a new box. With a strike against the worn out box, the match sprung to life and she placed it against the kindling.

A small fire started and warmth immediately started to seep out to her. A sigh. The smoke of a fresh fire in the morning was so relaxing. She grabbed a small log, placing it into her already burning fire. The fire slowly started to lick at the log until that eventually started as well. Pleased with her work she closed the small door and rubbed her arms. It was chilly this morning.

She shuffled her way into the small kitchen and put the kettle on the stove. Some tea would surely warm her up. With a few clicks the stove caught and started to warm the kettle. She took a few more steps towards the window and pulled the sheer curtain aside, watching lingering rain drops fall to the ground. The sun may not come out at all today, she thought. Then there was a small brush against her leg. She looked down and smiled at the small orange cat. He looked back up at her and let out a quiet meow.

“Hungry, bud?” She smiled as he responded with another meow and leapt up onto the counter. She grabbed a small metal bowl from the floor and set it down. She opened a ceramic jar and scooped out some food, pouring it into his metal bowl and setting it back on the floor. He immediately jumped down and hunched over in front of it, crunching some of the pieces. She smiled. The kettle started to hiss, alerting that the water was ready. She spun around and grabbed one of her favorite tea bags from the box. The last one. Mentally she started a shopping list. Tea bags. Matches. The necessities. She took the kettle from the stove and poured the steaming water over her tea. Immediately the scent of Earl Grey filled her nostrils. She breathed a sigh and smiled, setting the kettle back down and shutting off the stove. She took her cup and made her way back into the living room. She climbed into the bay window and pulled a throw over her lap. It was still dark and cloudy, the distant pattering of rain still present. She sighed and let the warmth of her tea make it’s way through her hands and up her arms.

She carefully brought the cup to her lips and took a slow sip. Warmth immediately filled her. It slid carefully down her throat and settled in her stomach, relaxing her bones and joints from the cold. She closed her eyes and just embraced the feeling for a moment, opening her eyes again to smile at the rain. If being cold was the trade off for moments like that, let it be cold. When she opened her eyes again she was greeted with the same cloudy sky and lingering rain drops.

The small cat from the kitchen made it’s way into the living room and jumped into the bay window with her, stretching and eventually settling down. She smiled down at him and rested her head against the wall. Another sip of tea. Another cold Sunday morning.

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Who am I?

Hello Universe!

I’m…well. I don’t know. Which I guess is the whole point of this blog entry. I don’t really…know who I am. Sure, I grew up as a girl named Melissa and grabbed a nickname of Miku in High School and it’s stuck with me through college. Looking at my life right now, though…

I don’t know who I am. Here, let me clarify. At this point in my life…I like a lot of different things and enjoy them all equally. I love playing video games, I love being a writer, I strive to be a baker, I love to sing, I love the Japanese fashion style called Himekaji, but I also love dressing…natural. You know, like flowing skirts and dresses. The only way I can describe it is kind of like a hippy, but not really. Boho? Is that what they’re calling it now? Either way…All of these things have vastly different styles and I can’t seem to land on one or the other to focus on.

I want to dress in everything pink and floral and live in Japan and then I want to dress in dark maroons and live in a rainy city like London. I don’t know what I want or who I am, really. I love J-Pop music but I also love relaxing music that you might hear in a coffee shop. Then another day, I’m listening to hardcore rock. I’m just…a bubble of so many different things. I ping pong from one style to another faster than the seasons change. What I mean by all of this is that it’s kind of left me….unsure of what I really want to be. Maybe that’s okay, though? Maybe it’s okay to just like a lot of different things all the time. I just wish it didn’t leave me so…unfulfilled.

I feel like people who know they are a gamer 100% have a style and stick to it. Like you walk into their house and it’s super clean with modern looking furniture and a big TV with a big chair and set up. Or someone that knows they are a writer and embraces that lifestyle with everything they have. Sitting in coffee shops, writing all day, at home surrounded by vintage furniture and hundreds of notepads, warm lighting. Yet, you come in my house and it’s gaming equipment surrounded by crafts, surrounded by my iPad for writing and notes for my story, surrounded by pink accents and cute stuffed animals.

I’m just a mess. It honestly makes me feel so defeated. The Mr. told me that it was okay to like all of these different things. That I don’t have to dedicate everything to one or the other, but…I feel like if I don’t do that…what am I missing out on? What am I missing in the gaming world while I’m writing? What am I missing on my pink and cute themed Tumblr account while I’m gaming? I want to…do all the things I enjoy all at once. And have it make sense. But instead I’m left with this…mess of a life.

*sigh*

I guess for now I’ll just keep on keepin’ on. I’m happy, so. I guess it can’t be so bad to enjoy all of the things. I wish I could tell myself to land on one thing and stick with it, but…I’m honestly not sure that I could.

Anyway…

To be continued.

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Sparkle in the Dark

Hello Universe.

Ack! I’m afraid I’ve been absent again. I have a good excuse this time, I promise. Well…maybe not a good excuse but an excuse all the same. In my free time, I’ve actually been going back to writing my novel. It’s hard to find time to write that and write here. If I had time to write in both, that would be lovely.

Unfortunately though, I can typically write in one or the other. I really want to write my book more, even as I’m writing here my mind is cooking up ideas and what I want to happen next. Today, I even had a little time to go back and re-write some of the stuff I’d already written. I finally made a reddit account and have been using that to discuss writing techniques with other writers. Since I don’t have many friends at the moment, or friends that are big writers, this has been great for me because I have people to bounce ideas off of.

Anyway, the title of this post is called Sparkle in the Dark because my book is currently my “light at the end of the tunnel” if you will. It takes me out of the darkest of times and I get to step away, if only just for a moment. Not that I’m going through an extremely hard time or anything, but…something about being a writer leaves a certain magic at my finger tips. When I write, I leave my shoes for a bit. I get to step into the heels of my royal vampire heroine Thea Sutter. A girl from Seattle who gets turned by a rouge vampire named Keiran O’Reilly.

The complicated relationship she has with Keiran evolves as she also grows to also have feelings for Elijah Abbott, the head of the family of Royal Vampires.

I love my story. I know that sounds cliche, but I honestly do. I’ve been a fan of vampires since I can remember and this is my step into that world. I grew up with vampires, honestly. Buffy the Vampire Slayer was one of the biggest shows on TV when I was younger. I remember watching it with my older sister and being so invested in the characters and the idea of vampires. As time went on, I tried to get into True Blood but couldn’t get past the stupid…snake-like fangs they had. Fangs are on the canines, not the tooth next to the front teeth.

Anyway–I digress. I love vampires and I love that I’m able to craft this world through words. That I can see my characters in my mind and portrait them pretty well on paper. I’m so thankful that I’m able to write. As much as drawing, singing, acting, and the other arts interest me as well, if I could only have one, I’m glad it’s writing.

What’s your spark in the dark? 🙂

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Valentine’s Day

Good morning, Universe.

It’s been a while. I apologize for my absence. I know I said I’d write more and I’ve been letting myself down in that respect, so I apologize.

I tend to do that with everything in my life, not just writing. I have this vision of grandeur that I’ll write more, I’ll work out, I’ll eat better, I’ll be more social, and it always flops back and I never have the motivation to change it. It makes it extremely hard to get anything done. But…I want to get better. When I say something like that, I want to hold myself to it. No excuses. If I don’t have time to work out, to write, etc…I need to MAKE time for it. It’s not like it can’t be done. The amount of time I spend reblogging things on my Tumblr or watching The Office for the 100th time through is astounding. Seriously. I’m at the point where I know which episode it is by the first 2 seconds of the opening clip. It’s bad. But at the end of the day…I have to make myself do it.

I know I can, it’s just a matter of sticking to it. I’m really going to give it my all, though. Besides, the gym that I have a membership at, they charge by the year. So I committed to a year of membership at this AMAZING gym. I really need to actually go on a regular basis. Not just because I want to get healthy but because I’m PAYING for it. Literally. Money on a monthly basis goes to this gym. So if I don’t go, I might as well take $50 out of my bank account and throw it in the trash.

Anyway….that’s not what this entry is supposed to be about. I actually just wanted to write about Valentine’s Day. The Mr. and I had a great night. I hate when Valentine’s Day is on a week day, but…we still made it special. We both left work a little early and went to this restaurant called The Melting Pot. It’s this cool fondue place. You basically have a pot on your table and put stuff in it. You might even say you melt things in it…Get it? Because…melting…pot…*Ahem*

Anyway! It was a four course meal (so much for getting healthy, amirite?) To be honest it wasn’t that bad. It was just a lot. So the first pot is a cheese fondue. We got this one that had some bourbon in it…bacon…cheddar. Need I say more? It was really yummy. Then we had some salads. They have a really good house dressing. Then they brought out our pot to cook in. They had specials for Valentine’s Day entrees so we went with “Lover’s Delight” which was basically some filet mignon, sirloin, pork, and some pot stickers. Then they gave us some batters to use if we wanted and cook them in the oil. It was super yummy. Then we finished off with our dessert pot which was chocolate with espresso. Dipped some fruit, pound cake, etc in that and then wanted to die. Seriously haha I was so full, but it was really yummy. Oh! On our table, there were flowers and chocolate covered strawberries. It was really sweet. The Mr. got me a new pair of TOMS shoes (which I wanted so bad) . It was just a really nice day.

By the time we got home it was still early enough that we both got to play some video games before bed. I had a really great day.

Oh, side note, I need to get back into playing Ukelele. I love my Ukelele. I saw some pictures of it yesterday on Instagram and I had a huge itch to pick it up again, but…it’s so hard to play. Granted, my nails don’t make it any easier. I should really take a break from having nails right now anyway. It would save me money, I could play guitar/uke again, I wouldn’t have to make time to go every two weeks. Plus, I’m sure my real nails underneath the acrylic could use a break. I just hate how my nails are weak and ache so bad after taking the acrylic off. I s’pose I could just learn how to play with nails. Maybe it’s not so hard. Online tutorials? Anyway…I’m rambling at this point.

Sealed with a kiss,

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Romance

Lately I’ve been wanting to feel more romance.

Not in my relationship with the Mr. But….in general. I want life to feel more…romantic. I want to look at freshly falling snow like it’s beautiful and magical. Not immediately groan and think about all the shoveling and cleaning off my car I’ll have to do.

I want to go outside when it’s dark out and appreciate the street lights and the light they cast.

I constantly find myself seeing the negative in everything right off the bat. That’s not what life is about, right? It can’t be. Now I know what Belle was talking about in Beauty in the Beast. “There must be more than this provincial life” She wanted romance too. She wanted her life to be something like the books she read. I can honestly say now that I am craving the same thing. I want to make the most out of the small moments and make them more than just the small moments. I want to keep my eyes wide and dreamy.

When I was a child I was so imaginative. I remember, we used to have a house up in Vermont that we’d go stay at for Winter and Summer vacations and the stories I used to come up with…or the thoughts I’d use to have while walking around…they were so big and grand. I remember precisely one evening it was a blizzard outside. I had bundled up to go sledding with my siblings and there were these snow tornadoes blowing about. I remember seeing them and imagining this beautiful snow goddess summoning them and it made the night so much cooler. Looking back, some might think of that night as just a night of sledding…but something about it being pitch black outside…with nothing to light our way but the glow from inside the house and a porch light…and these beautiful snow tornadoes that just made it such a fond memory for me.

I wasn’t thinking about how cold or wet it was…how the snow always managed to work it’s way down the back of your coat or right into your boots and get your socks wet. I wasn’t thinking about that at all! Perhaps it was because as a child we have so much less to stress about. We don’t have to worry about shoveling or getting to work in the “white crap” that I’ve resorted to calling it. The snow was just…snow. And at the same time maybe it wasn’t. Maybe it was something that this beautiful snow goddess was conjuring up.

Where did that imagination go? Where did the thoughtfulness and magic go? Why is everything suddenly about work, money, and bills? Why is it that we lose the magic, the romance as we get older?

I have to remind myself as I continue to age to not lose that magic…that mystery. That romance. That whimsy. Life is what you make it after all. And even if you have to sit through a work day, remind yourself to find those little moments of magic. I assure you that the world will seem like a much brighter place.

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La La Land

“City of Stars, are you shining just for me?”

Hello there.

Last night the Mr. and I saw the film La La Land. I typically don’t go crazy over a film like this, but a long time ago I saw an ad for it and it had an estimated date for release. Of course I forgot when and hadn’t realized that it was in theaters. I was so excited that I asked the Mr. if he wanted to go see it that day. Spur of the moment thing. He said yes because of course I knew he was dying to see a film that was essentially a giant musical. (Not. But he knew it would make me happy)

Anyway, we decided to go to the 4:05 PM showing at a theater near us. We arrived minutes before the movie was scheduled to start but to our dismay the tickets were completely sold out. Which was shocking in itself since the film had been out for a month already. I felt so deflated. I so wanted to see this film and finding out that it was sold out was absolutely heart breaking. Somehow knowing that it had already been out for a month made it worse because I wasn’t sure I’d get the chance to see it in theaters at all.

So we got back into my car and drove all the way back home. We decided to check other theaters to see if they were showing it and we found one in the other direction that had a showing at 7:15 PM. We didn’t really want to go to a film so late on a work night, but…decided that I wanted to see it bad enough to go to the 7:15 PM showing. So we bought our tickets ahead of time to avoid any sold out possibilities and left our house an hour and a half early so we could get good seats. When we arrived, we were the first in the theater and managed to get great seats right in the middle. A few more people filtered in but it wasn’t a packed theater. (At this moment I was thankful we didn’t get a ticket at the 4:05 showing because we definitely wouldn’t have had good seats or a mostly empty theater).

Eventually the film came on and from the moment it started until the moment it came to end, I was floored. This film was absolutely breathtaking. The soundtrack is beautiful, the story line is so romantic and dreamy. I think it struck a chord with me specifically because I love singing and writing so much. I’m an artist at heart and this movie was about achieving “foolish” dreams because they have to do with things like acting and music. I sincerely loved this film and I plan on buying it on DVD the day it comes out so I can relive the magic over and over again. I look forward to the day that this becomes a play so I can see that as well. (I’m sure it will become a play because it’s just that good)

Anyway, if you have the chance to see it while it’s in theaters I highly, highly recommend it.

I figured it warranted a blog post because it was a really great evening.

Cheers,

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Christmas Season

“Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way~”

Apparently it’s that time of year again. I feel like Christmas is here, but at the same time that it’s very far away and won’t be showing up anytime soon. Does anyone else get that feeling? Like, I’ve done Christmas shopping and we have our Christmas tree up, but…it just feels like it’s no where near happening yet.

Then I think…Huh. Christmas Eve is literally a week from now. 7 days. That’s not that much time! But, I’m mostly ready. I have all of my gifts purchased and most of them are wrapped. See–This is where the disconnect is. Christmas isn’t supposed to be about the gifts. But that’s what I’ve spent the last…month and a half stressing over.

That’s not what the holidays are supposed to be about. They should be about baking Christmas cookies and watching feel good Christmas movies. They should be about decorating the tree and enjoying the glow while watching it snow outside. They should be about celebrating Jesus. Not how much money I’ve spent on gifts or if I’ve wrapped everything nice enough. Or got something every one is going to like.

Regardless of all the stress of gift giving and wrapping and delivering, Christmas is still Christmas. Part of it feeling like Christmas is making it feel like Christmas. So I’ll do all of those things…watch Christmas movies, bake Christmas cookies, spend time with family. Maybe by just doing all those things and remembering not to stress over the presents I can restore my faith in the Christmas season. 🙂

Anyway, that was my post for today about the Christmas season. Tomorrow I think I’ll try to write about a video game I’m playing at the moment. FFXV. It’s so so good.

Cheers and Merry Christmas,

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Writing again

This is the excerpt for your very first post.

Hi everyone.

Lately I’ve really missed blogging. I don’t have a lot to say, but…sometimes when I do it’s nice to know that I have a place to do so. So I created this blog to just kind of…kick things off. Christmas is fast approaching and maybe as a New Year’s resolution it will be to write more. Well–Write more, lose weight, get married. You know, no big deal. Just small things.

That’s one thing that I’d like to write about for sure. My wedding! The boy and I got engaged on our five year anniversary. (Five years, holy smokes.) That’s a lot of time looking at his mug. But you know, I wouldn’t have it any other way. I knew as soon as I met him in that day he wasn’t just some guy that I thought was cute. There was an instant connection that couldn’t be ignored.

But I could talk about him for ages. I’ll save you the hassle of listening to me go on about how we were soul mates since day one. Anyway, I have a lot of planning to do for the wedding. I started writing a guest list and looking at places to have it. My co-worker suggested a great idea that I think I’m going to put into practice. Especially because it’s probably the most affordable option I’ll find for venues. I’m going to have a Rapunzel themed wedding. Lots of purple and gold touches. My bridesmaid dresses will likely be purple. Ahh, I’ve been dreaming about planning my wedding for ages. I have so many great ideas and I just hope that when the date comes (Date TBD) that I’ll have the money to make everything happen.

What does that mean? Well…saving. Being more frugal. (No more random purchases for me!) Which should be good anyway, most of my unimportant purchases happen to be clothing which, let’s face it, if I’m going to lose weight, I shouldn’t be buying a bunch of clothes in my current size. A girl can dream. I also would like to sell a lot of the stuff we have in the house at the moment. Just…stuff we’ve acquired over the years. I’m not really even sure how it happened but we ended up buying more furniture than I’ve ever had in my life. (All from this really cute antique shop in the area. Seriously–like all of our pieces.) I don’t like how mismatched everything looks, either. It looks like the antique shop threw up in our living room. Which–some people can pull off. Not me.

I think that this will be good for me, though. Blogging. I like getting these thoughts off my chest and posting them here well…somehow holds me accountable? I’ll probably make another post tomorrow about the Christmas season. I’ve been having a hard time getting into the spirit and I want that to stop. Christmas is a happy time and there’s no reason that I’m letting myself get stressed out over presents. But that’s not what Christmas is about. Anyway, that’s a post all on it’s own. So that’s that. A blog for my thoughts.

You’ll see a theme of different images of fairy lights as they tend to inspire me and make me think dreamy thoughts. Dreamy thoughts. Is that a normal saying? Probably not. Anyway! Thanks for reading all this way if you have. Check back tomorrow for my post on Christmas.

Cheers,

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